Wake-upper:

Scene: Donald John Trump was elected the 45th president of the United States last Tuesday in a stunning culmination of an explosive, populist and polarizing campaign. On Election Night, however, Trump’s star became the site of a victory party. Supporters gathered at his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, chanting “U-S-A!” and wearing “Make America Great Again” hats. The star had been defaced several times over the course of the election.

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The story of hair and beauty guru Bebei Tagoctoc is a ‘hairy’ kind of success story at all.

Bebei Tagoctoc is known as the "Mother of All Hair 

and Make-up Artists in Bohol" who

 started as utility boy at a small beauty parlor 

and working his way to the top. Contributed Photo

Bebei, the "Mother of All Hair and Make-up Artists in Bohol," started as utility boy at a small beauty parlor (called Blue Petals) inside the old BQ Mall, working his way to the top.

"At 15, I dropped out at school," recalled Bebei.  “I am a firm believer of education, but I had to stop from my studies because of poverty.”

It was at the Blue Petals’ beauty parlor where Bebei’s talents was enhanced and developed.  He decided to apprentice in that Blue Petals where he started as a mere parlor sweeper, then eventually became a manicurista, a neophyte hairdresser and a make-up artist.

In 1987, Bebei opened his salon on CPG Avenue, consisting of a wall mirror, a shampoo chair, a bowl, and a dryer. It wasn’t much, but to Bebei it meant everything, as it was something he could call his own. It was Jun Quimpan, Bebei’s partner, who encouraged and helped him to establish his own salon.

Due to unavoidable circumstances, Bebei’s salon transferred to Lambert’s Building along Ma. Clara Street, then finally settled at K of C Drive.  However, his loyal clients continue to hire his services.

Twenty-nine years later, Bebei has become an institution in his own right, sought-after by the clients, mostly the who’s who in Tagbilaran, who submit themselves wholeheartedly to his "magic touch" which sometimes transforms them into completely new and different personalities, beautiful inside and out.

Name a who’s who and a star and Bebei has touched her:  Christine Hermosa, Piolo Pascual, Ruffa Mae Quinto, Jericho Rosales, Philippine top models, when they came to Bohol.  Bebei was tasked to touch their delicate faces.  In 2005, when Miss Earth candidates came to Bohol, Bebei was hired as the official make-up artist.

Bebei said he has never snubbed a client since he knew how to deal clients with tantrums.

“As possible, I please them,” he said.

Coming out

Bebei starts his day very early by praying. Then, he does prepare for the salon at K of C Drive.

Bebei Tagoctoc has become an institution in 

his own right that clients like couple Harold and 

Agnes Jesuro trust Couple Harold and Agnes Jesuro 

seeks Bebei’s Hair and Make-up and Rental Packages

 for their wedding last June. Contributed Photo

Everyday is a busy day. If he’s not at his salon, he’s somewhere else doing home service for a bride and her entourage. He also designs gowns.

Bebei was one of a handful few “bayots” in the city who came out in early ‘60s.  He said “coming out” in those years was a suicide.

Even as a kid, Bebei knew he was gay. He would draw faces, figures and fashion designs on his notebooks.  He liked dolls.

“It was something a near to death experience when you were coming out. It was a moment to see if society accepts my true identity or not,” he shared.

Bebei has experienced different layers of discrimination throughout his life- for his sexuality. Each time, he shrugs it off.

“I let them go,” he said, “I am not the one who is kawawa. I know myself.”

He said being a Marian devotee has helped him to conquer obstacles in life. He owns a Mater Dolorosa (Our Lady of Sorrow) statue after he was inspired during his many visits at the St. Joseph Cathedral. The statue of the Mater Dolorosa at the Cathedral was donated by the late Charing Dejaresco.

“I like the Dolorosa’s teary-eyed and I felt her love for me,” he said.

Bebei’s life story was featured on GMA’s Jessica Soho Reports. It was no less than multi-awarded journalist Jessica Soho called Bebei as “Ricky Reyes of Bohol.”

‘Mothering’

Bebei spends much of his time “mothering” to other “bayots” who asked his help. Even Lamok, who once dubbed the “Beautiful Boxer”, could testify Bebei’s good heart. It was Bebei who adopted him when he was down.

As of this year, Bebei has two adopted “badings”. He may not have completed his education but he is sending them to college.

President-elect Donald Trump’s star, which 

had been defaced several times over 

the course of the election, becomes

 the site of a victory party. 

Supporters gathered at his star on

 the Hollywood Walk of Fame, chanting 

“U-S-A!” and wearing “Make America Great Again”

 hats. Your VRS’s 2015 photo at the star 

of the 45^th president of USA. 

“I told them to finish school for a bright future,” he said.

Bebei said he has no plan to stop working, not yet.

“I don’t have any plans to stop working, or to stop helping,” he said.  “I love what I am doing with the love of the people.”

Come to think of it, if he were not a hair and make-up artist, what would he have been?

"A teacher," said Bebei. "I love to teach."

But with what he’s doing, Bebei has more than achieved that dream.

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Thanks for your letters, all will be answered. Comments welcome at leoudtohan@yahoo.com, follow leoudtohanINQ at Twitter and leoudtohan at Instagram/Facebook.

Happy and gay

It was a sultry Saturday when I saw Andrew and Angelo “El El” sporting new haircuts. They are my neighbors and my distant relatives who are clearly referred to Lady Gaga’s hit song “Born This Way.” 

 

Although there are no accurate predictions to be made based on a child’s behavior, we’re for sure then they were destined to become gays. Why? Andrew, who is four years older than El El, was effeminate, while El El when he cried to ask for milk--- it was different--there was something in his cry that made him different from other boys. When El El learned to talk, there we knew he’s different! When he learned to walk, he walked as if he’s on a catwalk. Confirmed!  They mingled with other kids mostly with girls where they played “Barbie dolls.”

 

El El and Andrew when they were kids (left) and reunited after ten years. Like straight people, gay people come in all shapes, sizes and colors, with all kinds of behaviors and mannerisms.  So you can't truly know your kid's sexuality until he/she tells you.

Aida, El El’s mom, sometimes bought some girlie things for her son like girl’s dress, headbands and make-up. Some neighbors scolded Aida for treating his son like a girl, but Aida defended she liked to see her son like a girl. 

When Andrew was seven, he left for Manila to stay with his only sister after his mom passed away. El El was left in the neighborhood. He had joined dancing and singing contests in the city. We didn’t hear what happened to Andrew until after ten years he came back to the province and reunited with El El. 

 

They become best buds! They’re inseparable. Andrew is now known as Princess Nicole Montenegro and El El is Princess Fherisse Aiko Fortigal. They are not only gays but openly and honestly gays. 

Andrew and El El are few of the homosexuals in our clan on my father’s side. We have had Nong Tildo (deceased), Fabio, Allan, Esoy, Dodong, Arnel and Bagoctoc. 

Why there are so many gays in our clan? The answer is I don’t know.  But like a flower blooms in the field, in every generation, there could be a different flower. 

So, we accepted the fact that we have gay cousins.  In many of our clan’s gatherings, they always brighten our days. It becomes livelier when they meet with other members of the federation.... as the saying goes, birds with the same feather are a good feather duster, ehem, flock together! It’s really more fun being gay in the Philippines. 

 

However, behind their happy faces, Andrew and El El have personally experienced discrimination. They’re often ridiculed. Since they are wearing women’s dress and heavy make-up when they go out, some people are badmouthing against them. But they don’t give it a second thought. They have accepted their fate as it is part of the society when you’re gay. 

Some religious people told them they could not enter heaven because they are homosexuals. But they answered those religious people in jest, “if we can’t enter heaven, we will stay in the rainbow!” 

Nothing is causing the level of gays. They don’t make babies but they are increasing. Aren’t they? 

You are born that way, according to some experts. The fact is being gay has been an accepted part of life in the Philippines though how many times the members of the lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transsexuals (LGBT) community have been fighting for their rights against discrimination. 

Here, homosexuals are called bakla or bading. The former has developed slightly derogatory connotations for some, while the latter is somewhat milder. In Visayas, bayot is the term forbakla. 

Effeminate men and homosexuals in general are called binabae ("of a womanly sort"), from the Tagalog word babae, which means "woman." 

If you act effem or sissy, people would tell you are a “member of the federation.” 

Stereotyped homosexuals openly work in beauty parlors and in the creative industries of fashion and entertainment, such as talk show hosts, female impersonators, writers, directors and comedians. They have long been part of the Filipino cultural landscape. 

There are also those "maya (a sparrow),” a term for bisexual men, who act like a real men but like men. They are doing bro-mance! 

There are also “paminta (pepper),” another term for bisexual who go to gym and outwardly straight-looking men who also like men. 
Like love, gays come in all different shapes, sizes, colors and backgrounds.   

Note: Two weeks ago, Andrew has left Bohol to find a greener pasture in Manila. Another gay relative Arnel aka Iwa Moto went to Manila to look for a job and he’s staying with Andrew.

 

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Thanks for your letters, all will be answered. Comments welcome at leoudtohan@yahoo.com, follow leoudtohan at Twitter /Facebook.

After visiting France and Rome, Anecita Neves-Arcay of Tierra Azul in Panglao went to Austria to see the glorious alpine scenery, monumental Habsburg architecture and the world’s favorite musical.
She visited Salzburg, the home to Mozart and all things baroque, and The Sound of Music.   “A fulfilled childhood dream,” said Annie.